The insecurities of a new mom is limitless, she is insecure even about the way she talks. The best way to be there for a new mom is smiling and listening. Showing love and care. Bringing her food and assuring her all the time that it’s okay to ask for help.
It’s important to be mindful of the comments made towards a new mom.
A Melbourne mom, of Indian descent, committed suicide and fillicide because she could not handle a baby, looking after the house and the changes that affected her life. Speaking softly, calmly and patiently to a new mom, is mandatory.
It’s important to remember, at childbirth, not only a baby is born; a mother is born too. And she has no idea how to raise this bundle of beautiful, vulnerable mess. It’s important to know how to be around a new mom.
Some thoughts that goes on and on through a woman’s mind after childbirth, whether or not they got diagnosed for post natal depression.
- Oh my god! What happened to my body ? I was supposed to go back to normal…I’m permanently damaged!
- I can’t sleep, is my baby breathing ? Does the diaper need changing ? Should I feed now ?
- Why I am covered with…is this milk ?
- Why am I covered with puke…is this yogurt ?
- Im feeling hungry. Is there more food ? Am I eating like a hippo ?
- Oh no! The pacifiers are out of reach, I can’t move.
- Oh no! My mobile is out of reach, I can’t move.
- I need to use the toilet. I can’t move.
- Did he feed well ? Did I do it right ? Am I a bad mom ?
- Is this poop healthy ? Was that enough , should I have waited more while feeding ? Am I a bad mom ?
- What am I doing wrong ? Is this normal ? Is my baby normal ?
- Why did they say my baby looks small ? Is this normal ?
- Why did they say, my baby was crying too much ? Is this normal ?
- …the trauma of labour and delivery.