I am a woman – bite me!

I should be studying now, and yet, here I am. I moved myself away from the TV room so I don’t get distracted and yet , here I am. They are watching the documentary India’s Daughter, a documentary which was made with permission from Jyoti Singh’s parents; a documentary that Indian government banned because it contains graphic descriptions of the rapist blaming the victim for her rape. Her fault ? She should not have been by herself at 9 pm at night.

Our society never fails to stun me. Government condemns the documentary because it is “highly derogatory and an affront to the dignity of women”. Really ? Hang on. Rewind. “highly derogatory and an affront to the dignity of women” – this is the same government and society who allows their film industry to portray women as “item  girls”, welcomes a porn star to join the industry with wide arms. Money really talks well…

Crime against women and sexual assault is a part of everyday lives in our society.Growing up in this society as a girl is a burden. In this era of advancement, in some parts of the world, the role of a man is more important than that of a woman. A son is more important than a daughter, a husband is always considered correct and a father is always the decision maker. Men are empowered so much that the innocent minds of young girls feel insignificant. The innocent mind would make us wish we were a boy, because the society shows us every moment, boys are more important and deserve more attention. If we are a boy, we never have to leave the house and family we grew up with, our own parents won’t think that we belong to another family. The simple terms “Dada-dadi” are considered more important than “Nana-nani” because society brain-washes us that paternal grandparents were more important than maternal grandparents. As we grow up, and turn from a girl into a woman, we are asked not to run or jump. To ensure we are wrapped with a dupatta – why ? Because our womanly treasures is considered indecent despite the fact that they are the reason for the existence of life. Because we would be eve-teased by men in the streets if we didn’t cover our-self well. We are expected to speak in a low volume to appear sober, we are expected to avoid laughing to loud in public because it would attract men’s attention. We are considered dirty if we hang out with a bunch of other boys and share a bond of friendship. We are vulgar if we swear. We are sluts if we have a boyfriend, is divorced, is single.

Throughout our lives, we feel the need of a man for protection: a brother, father, uncle, husband, grandfather for the sake of security. We are made to feel that we are not smart enough, strong enough and tough enough to take on this World by ourselves. The very core beliefs of our society make us feel insignificant from the moment we are born. Our society feels proud if a boy-child is born to a couple and some even go to them extent of offering condolences if a girl child is born. Don’t get me started on foeticide of female fetus.

We are all so much infected by the virus called gender discrimination, that even in our own minds we doubt our own capacity , ability to be equal to or even better than a man.

Back to the documentary … the rape incident , a rape incident, any rape incident that is happening right now, in some corner, some part of the world. Think about this moment and in this moment there is a girl out there, being sexually assaulted by a man who thinks its okay to man-handle her, rape her, sexually assault her because she is a female. Think about this moment where a woman thinks, its okay to be assaulted because she is defenceless, powerless against any man. Think about this moment when a child is born out of assault, a child witnesses assault and thinks it is acceptable. Think about this moment when an innocent man is being assaulted by a woman, even sexually assaulted by a woman, because her history of has taught her that it is okay to be violent, it is okay to sexually assault, because it is okay to disrespect someones dignity, regardless of their gender.

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